What a difference a year makes. So, there we were – three women named Karen, all connected through our sons, who were all born in Kazakhstan. And as any of you who have traversed the international adoption journey know, that connection and experience creates a bond so intimate and special that it makes the previously odd or “that will never happen” assumptions melt away. So, we were off, starting the journey at the Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky airport, where Kentucky Karen (hereafter known as KY) picked up Minnesota Karen (hereafter known as Minnie). KY and I have been making it a point to get together, as we are only 90 miles apart. In fact, you've seen her son Nick featured in our blog (and vice versa with Max on their blog), but this was the first time that KY and Minnie -- frequent Facebook buddies -- were meeting in person. They then headed to my house, I jumped in the car, and we were off to the woods. But, not without first stopping in Cincinnati’s Mt. Adams area and enjoying a great Thai lunch while seated on a rooftop patio. Cincinnati may be landlocked in the heart of the Midwest, but there are some beautiful views and relaxing venues throughout our fine town.
Then it was off to the woods, where only KY, a veteran of the bed-and-breakfast country-inn world seemed to know what we were getting ourselves into. She also handled all of the planning, organizing, up-front financing, and Mapquesting, and I’m up for just about anything if all I have to do is stand in my driveway with a suitcase in one hand and a pile of People magazines in the other. And what a blast it was. I can’t remember the last time I was that disconnected technologically – and it was marvelous. Sure, we all missed our boys – especially since we literally could not call them – there was no cell service deep in these woods, and no land lines in our cabin. It was just a whole bunch of relaxing, a bit of hiking, a lot of reading (nothing too deep – the aforementioned People was top on our list), and a ton of talking. Oh, and plenty of snacking and eating, too. KY makes a killer homemade caramel corn mixture that may soon have its own associated 12-step program to break its habit-forming addiction. It’s seriously that good. Max is the youngest of our boys (Garrett will soon be 7 and Nick is 5), so I soaked in as much parenting advice as I could from these two amazing women. I’m ready for the next weekend. Now, if someone else would just get busy planning it. ☺
Minnie purchased these beautiful Minnesota shirts for us, and we were more than happy to pose for pics in those shirts. Given that wearing mine makes me remember even more fondly my beloved Aunt Barb, who spent her happiest years in Minnesota, I am happy to wear mine alot even now! (You'll recall that I met Minnie for the first time when I flew to Minnesota for my Aunt's memorial service, and meeting Minnie, husband Bob, and their son Garrett that weekend was such added joy for an otherwise very difficult trip).
Minnie wasn't flying out until Monday morning, and we are so happy that she agreed to stay with us on Sunday night. Max had a great time building a puzzle with Minnie!
Both Minnie and KY Karen wrote great stories about our trip – with a nice mix of Jesus and the “Brady Bunch” tossed in. Doesn’t that elevate your curiosity?? Jump on over to the Minnie and KY blogs -- I promise that their additional stories are worth your mouse clicks!
The day after we arrived home, my friend Heather had her third daughter, baby Annie Kate, so we borrowed now middle-child Ellie a few days later for a day of fun with Max. We’ve had a few days of summer-like weather, and that particular Saturday it was over 80 degrees. I love how you can put two buckets of water and a few toys in little toddler hands, and just sit back and watch their imaginations take over.
Heather’s husband Rich somehow managed to train to run the Cincinnati marathon in the midst of getting ready for his third daughter to be born. Heather and I bundled up Max and her oldest daughter, Maggie, and we headed out to the course at 7:00 AM to cheer Rich along (this was 12 days after Heather had her baby -- they are both rock stars!). Despite having searched for and cheered along a number of friends throughout a lot of marathon courses, we never did find him (thanks to him running at a much speedier pace than he told us he would – way to go, Rich!). The kids were so well-behaved, keeping themselves busy on “bug hunts” at every stop along the course. They had their heads buried to the ground almost exclusively, so I'm sorry that I did not get a better picture of their faces.
Between my Kazamommy weekend and Ellie’s visit, Max participated in his “eating” test at Children’s Hospital. (I’m using the word “participated” lightly). I’m hesitant to say much if anything bad about the experience, because every test, appointment, and procedure we’ve had with Children’s up to this point has been exceptional. Until the eating test. ☺ It started off bad from the onset when Max was placed in a chair that sat very close to the ground, and then he was locked in with a high-chair like tray that butted up against his chest. I felt claustrophobic for him, and his “Up Mama, Pleeeeez, Up Papa, Pleeeeez” cries were tough to absorb. I quickly sat down on the floor next to him, which calmed him down a bit, and the therapist started the test.
First, it was cream cheese, then Cheez Whiz, then Goldfish crackers, then saltines, then applesauce, then pudding, then rice crispie treats, then something else, and something else, and something else, and a lot more something else’s, the latter of which required leaving the room, heating things, scavenging through cupboards/refrigerators/grocery sacks (I’m only surmising that part – we stayed locked in the room during her comings and goings), etc., etc., etc. I lost track of how many things they tried to get him to eat. The results? He swallowed the applesauce. Everything else he spit out without ever chewing. Actually, towards the end, he just flat out refused to open his mouth, except to yell “NO!” at the top of his lungs. We finally called it quits when he started crying and pleading again “Up, Mama, Pleeeeeez” with tears streaming down his face. The diagnosis was “weekly sessions to work on food sensitivities and aversion” – or something along those lines. I’d check the provided diagnostic information to get it right for this blog, except I tossed it in the trash awhile ago. You see, that night, Glenn and I talked it over, and we decided that weekly therapy was a bit extreme. We decided to “wait and see”, while also continuing to seek ways to have Max’s speech monitored and evaluated.
The very next day, Max’s eating habits seemed to change – and he even snagged two chicken nuggets from Ellie’s plate during her Saturday stay at our house. He bit into the chicken and chewed it like we’ve never seen before. (I was so shocked that I grabbed the video camera and filmed it for Glenn, who was at work – and for any therapist who is interested in seeing it down the road). We’d like to think that Max listened intently to Glenn and me discussing the need (or no need) for “weekly therapy”, and he thought to himself, “Wow, I better start eating or these people are going to lock me away in a room with that crazy therapist!” Of course, that’s clearly not what happened, and instead he just decided to start eating and chewing like other kids his age. We’ve had a few backslides since then, but for the most part, he is getting so much better and we are worrying less.
Judge me if you must -- this is McDonald's in its entirety. I blame the need for fast food on Ellie, who has alot of food allergies, and whose mother knows she'll eat McD's chicken nuggets without breaking out into hives. ☺
From a speech standpoint, we are having Max evaluated again at the end of this month, this time with our state’s Early Intervention program. We are all for getting him additional speech help, but we’ll pass on the “food therapy” for now.
While wrapping up our first full year with Max, we are also cheering along big brother Tyler, as he finishes his senior year. Senior Prom was the night before Mother’s Day, and Glenn and Max headed over to see Tyler and his buddies all dressed up for the big night. I was in Columbus, celebrating another big night – the “bachelorette dinner” for my dear friend Kelly, who is marrying Gordie, Max’s future hockey coach, in June! That’s going to be one fantastic celebration! No pics from my night out, as the camera stayed behind to document the prom, but I too had a magical night with a group of women who are all blissfully happy for Kelly.
I drove home that night to be sure to be in bed the next morning when my little munchkin delivered breakfast in bed for Mother’s Day – my very first Mother’s Day with Max at home. Yes, we will work with Max to ensure that he can speak in sentences that are longer than two words, but in the meantime, his efforts to get out complete sentences are both commendable for effort and so darn cute. Check out the video to hear his version of “Happy Mother’s Day.”
As I post this, we are celebrating Adoption Day. One year ago today, on May 12, 2008, Zakary Makseem became our son when we were granted the adoption in a little courtroom in Ust-Kamenogorsk. The time has flown by -- how can it be a year already?! Happy Adoption Day, Max!
Happy Belated Mother's Day to all of the Mom's out there, and to those of you who are still in your journey to your children, a special shout-out to you as well. We are cheering you on and praying for a speedy journey!
